The Raven

sorry

2006-08-02T09:02:00.000-07:00

ok i am sorry i am writing the raven by hand and will update with three or more days just give me time ok

lol aio uncle y u take my balls and squeez XD !!!!

sry bout that...dunno wat the heck happenned there lol

well yah if u wanna read my writing go to tokyopop.com and look up a member called raven56 lol

AUF VEDER ZEHEN!!!

Day 5: THE SILENT TREATMENT

2006-07-19T23:15:00.000-07:00

The sun only just rising over the horizon peeks out and casts a golden glow on the world. sunlight comes in through a window and shines on a figure laying on the hard bright wooden floors remaining motionless. next to the figure a girl seemingly younger sits waiting. All the sudden ravens eyes slowly open and look over at the girl.

A long stareing contest seems to take place as Raven inspects the girl. She is a little pale with long black hair, and seems pretty well figured. Her eyes seem to be jet black pearls waching the lone figure.

sudenly the girl puts her hand on ravens forehead and says "how are you feeling?". Raven then slightly confused sais "im fine...who are you?". The girl then gets up revealing a slim figure hearing a long sweater a skirt and stockings. "you dont remember me?" the girl says with a slightly sad tone. "well i guess it was pretty extensive huh? to tell the truth hun, you used to love me.". The girl then climbed on top of him and bent down and kissed him. Raven looked up with utter confusion and asked again "who are you?". The girl looked down and then with a soft light voice said "well...there isnt any fun in telling you who i am if you cant remember.". With that wern stuck her tongue out at raven and folded her arms together and seemed to pout. Just then Ravens eyes struck wide open and he reached up and rans his fingers through her hair and then sat up and kissed her saying "Im sorry i could never forget about my little angel". Then the girl laid down hugging his arm saying "its about time but now that means you get the silent treatment". The girl then smiled and nestled her head into ravens arm. Raven then got up and said "Awe thats not fair. You know its not my fault.". then as raven said this the girl said "you should get some more rest.". Raven then said "ok but dun do anythin to me in my sleep Wern.". giving a slight giggle she said "im not making any promises...".

Day 4: the girl

2006-07-09T12:41:00.000-07:00

waking up raven sees he is now in a very dark room on a bed. as he gets up he notices something. Next to him there is another figure. This person is only a slight bit smaller and seems to be a girl. as Raven gets up he struggles then falls back again. Something is tremendously wrong, but he does not know what. The girl next to him finally gets up and notices him trying to move. The girl then whispers "you shouldnt try to move like that, it is only making you weaker." Raven unable to comprehend takes all of his streangth and finally surges with all of his force to his feet. The girl then startled gets up. Two wings spread from ravens back. Black and full of feathers. Suddenly Ravens eyes glow read and an eerie silence takes place. Then as if all energy was gone raven collapses to the ground, now weaker than before. The girl goes over to him and helps him back to the bed. She then gives him a light kiss with a single word "remember..."

done: doom guy B.F.G.

2006-07-04T02:14:00.000-07:00

this is the final version lol hope ya like it

my WH40k conversions

2006-07-01T12:26:00.000-07:00

my warhammer conversions. lol some were DAMN hard to make...so be nice

day three is before this post, look back if u have to...

day 3: here?

2006-06-30T12:51:00.000-07:00

Walking down orchard Walking down orchard road, midnight. Drunk, happy, exotic, extreme, innocent. Raven looking up at the moon sat there pensive as usual. Sitting on top of the tallest building, just laying down looking at the stars. The world seems so quiet from so high, the stars shining bright. As Raven looks up suddenly the scene around him changes and he is on a park bench with a girl, sitting in the snow falling softly. Then Raven turns to look at the face of the girl next to him but as he tries Raven is back at Orchard road on the roof. He looks down, and a single tear falls.
road he see’s the people around him, so content with their own lives they wouldn’t think of looking at anyone else. Twisting and turning he walks aimlessly, still thinking, always thinking. Finally a dead end, but not enough. Raven turns around and walks down the alleyway he ventured into.

Now as pensive as ever Raven with a whisper says “Why am I here?”. As Raven says these words the world around him becomes dark, and all light is gone. Raven collapses into oblivion, seeming never to return.

day 2: lost

2006-06-26T23:29:00.000-07:00

Wandering around the city Raven hears the humming of people left and right and motors roaring down the road. A bell goes off, marking eight rings. Still early in the day the sun is still only just touching the city of Singapore. As Raven starts to walk he starts to notice a mark on his arm. The mark is a pulsating red glow on the back of Ravens wrist. The mark then makes him notice his attire, a patients outfit in a hospital that reveals almost all skin on his body. Rushing into the nearest clothing store raven emerges from the store wearing black baggy pants, a white long sleeve shirt with a black shirt over it.

Now being only noted once in a while he walks down a very busy road several lanes wide. The sign next to him read “Orchard rd”. As he kept walking he found himself accidentally bumping into a short kid that screwed “Shit man watch out!”. Raven got up and said “I’m sorry, could you help me out, I think im lost. Where am I?”. Looking almost stupefied by the question the boy said “Your at Orchard Road!”. Then Raven with a slight tension said “im not stupid, I mean to ask what city is this?”. Then the guy said “Dude are you stupid! You are in Singapore.”. After a few short seconds Raven said “Oh well my name is Rrrav….I mean Ben.”. The other guy turned and said “ok my name is louis, you like apple?”. Almost the most random question to be asked Raven said “Yah they taste really good, especially the green ones.”. Louis then with a face that is best described by the word Gah Said “I mean the computers!!!”. Thinking quickly Ravens face turned into complete puzzlement then said “There is an apple that is called computer?”. Louis then holding his rage in said “Follow me please…”.

Walking down orchard road Louis weaved in and out of the crowds until finally reaching a building with a large teepee shaped glass entrance. When we got inside there were escalators and a big bookstore behind them. On the way up the escalators Raven commented “Where are we going?”. Then louis pointed at a store with a logo similar to an apple, and inside was all sorts of electronic devices. Louis then with a relieving tension said “this is what apple is.”. Looking confused Raven started to look around till something caught his eye. A silver laptop with the apple logo was on display just sitting there. Raven then closed his eyes for a moment, then said to louis “ok lets go.”. On their way out louis looked over to see raven with a bag slung around to his side. Louis then noticed something and said “So you got a Mac? I told you they were good.”.
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ok well thats part two...any feedback will be welcome thanks ^^

Day 1: awake...

2006-06-25T00:58:00.000-07:00

A room silent with two beaming lights shines down on a solitary body, a nineteen year old boy with long brown hair and hazelnut eyes. The room has been quiet for over 4 years, and barely a single soul has entered the room. He lies there motionless with his eyes wide open. A paper next to his bed reads the name “Raven” under patients name. The lifeline attached to the Raven will be cut at six ‘o’ clock am today, and it is already two thirty. The time goes by until one of the lights in the room flickers, and finally cuts out. Then in the darkness a voice sais “Im not giving you a second chance, im just clearing my conciense.”.

Six ‘o’ clock am, the docters enter the room too pull the plug, and as they cut off the power to Ravens heart beat monitor, the docter states he will only live for another five days in his coma state and should be drugged with morphine then have his heart stopped. As the final preparations are put in place the doctor stops his heart. The docter then sais to the nurse helping him “Well…at least he is in a better place now, get him out of here. Since there is no one to pay for the funeral throw him in an unmarked grave.”.

Eight ‘ o’ clock Ravens body is dumped into the hole that should be his home for the rest of eternity. As the body is about to be put into the hole, the sound of a bird rings into Ravens ears. At that moment Raven opens his eyes gets up and walks away into the city of Singapore…

"sigh"

2006-06-24T10:08:00.000-07:00

to put things the best way... i have been tired, and been trying deperatly to keep myself occupied. I am doing a few things:

1.reading love hina books 1-14

2. painting all 46 of my vostroyan army again, plus typhus.

3.read megatokyo buy new book.

4.keep blog up to date.

5. start plans for online story.

6. plan terrain for 40k map(like real terrain snow,buildings,mud,etc).

7.learn to draw proper anime/manga characters.

8. plan my trip back to the U.S.

9.look into job at mcdonalds with jae.

10.get to know new family

11. keep depression level down

12. cope with being told i look depressed by peeps in ma family.

...this is a pretty big list, and i know some people that love to boast so much that they will make up some invisible list, "i dun care". Im just gonna try to get through all this. the new background is in tokyo, which is a really kewl pic. been thinkin bout puttin a song on my blog, but i think that if i did that people would start to get annoyed. lol not that i should worry considerin only like 2 people actually leave comments. i dunno if anyone reads it...oh well. if you read properly above im gonna start a story hopefully :P. I am not sure about a direct storyline but to start, i will wing it lol.

been listenin to panic at the disco, linkin park, tweaker, etc and been tryin to concentrate. it seems like when i try somethin comes up. i was thinkin that maybe i could look into sellin my two xbox's games controllers etc. I want to give one of them to my sis, but she couldnt get any new games and the power is diff, and cannot be converted to work. yah family is a pretty diff word for me now, so much has happenned in one year...most people only had to cope with freshman year, but i had that on top of ALOT of family crisis. id say that most of it would make alot of people just blow their brains out. i mean its been hard for me, and people are tellin me to accept it cause it is real, well instead of sayin "screw you this is my life too" i just let things happen. And now i am just so confused about my future, what i want to do one day. lol goin to japan with a friend to get a minimum wage job wouldnt go well wit peeps in ma family prolly, and I have a pretty big decision to make, people think its early. I mean it seems like it but i have 3 years to make a solid decision, I gotta do something. I am not very smart, and my immagionation is too outragous to do me any good. Engineer, teacher, archeoligist, store manager :P...i really dunno wat to do. I wish i could ask peeps...but lately everyone has been busy with everyone else...of course is k.

now alot of people read stuff online, even manga. I myself have found a manga by the name of MEGATOKYO. this online comic/manga has really helped me in many ways. it has helped me get through depressions, helped me make depressions, get through stress, even help me to become a better person. It has helped me write stories, drawings, and in a way made me think that a simple life would be better than a busy life.

OH WELL...

people have asked me why I choose the word Raven...but if you know me you know why i chose it. Ravens a dark hidden creatures that watch the world go by, but have a simple happy life.Ravens is also the name for pilots of mechanized battlesuits called armored core units AC for short. I used to use a forum called ARMORED CORE ONLINE years ago, and i referred to myself as BLACK RAVEN...simple to think but at the time it made sense for me. favorite color is black just in case people didnt know, but in a way i also fear the color. I used to run a small organization know as the Demonic Gaurd...sworn to protect people keep the peace and gaurd religeon at LGB. was pretty kewl back then and i took it VERY serious. but the group broke up after adam left, and thomas ans sami hated each other. I was left alone pretty much. after that my life in switzerland was coming to an end, all i wanted to do was make people happy. everyone there was depressed...was like a war ghetto. I had my teachers thinkin i was stupid untill exams when i passed em all...and i got pretty good grades on em. movin was diff, singapore turned out to be one thin after another. i dunno how to get around singapore without taxi, my EZ card is empty, I have no money, and people just dun talk except to people like benny. I guess it makes sense...people just think i cant do shit...well i guess they arent too good of friends. been makin ammends lately with thomas and lisa...thomas is a really nice person that i feel i treated like shit. Lisa...is a year younger and i made promises...promises that couldnt be kept. well now she stopped talkin all together. oh well...

ok will start posting story sometime this upsomin week. if there are any requests ideas etc i am open.

im feelin...unwanted

2006-06-19T11:21:00.000-07:00

I have been really, not myself i guess lately. I used to enjoy people just randomly asking how i am, or just saying hi in fact i still do. It has been a while since this has happenned, in fact i have not had a good discussion with anyone for a while. whether people just dont care, or just feel i dont want to talk to them im not sure. maybe i am over reacting, but it hurts to feel unwanted, even to me. The only person that really wondered...that really cared...is half way around the world. He lives in Switzerland, and his name is Thomas. He has no reason to like me, i called him an idiot behind his back, and i am still ashamed of this. Maybe I am so undeserving of friends, he noticed and reached a helping hand to me. I am not sure, and I am sorry if i shouted at anyone and i understand now why. I am not really a friend to anyone, and the only people that really see me as one, live half way around the world or are ordered to protect me.

Truth or Dare?

2006-06-16T06:31:00.000-07:00

After reading the title of this post, you are probably thinking "yah that game, ive played it before". well you havnt played with my friends. im having to start a list now of dares.

1. wear a celt next halloween

2.kiss someone you havnt from SAS (Teh evil -.-)

3.I have to do something in the hotel E.lei is staying at (all i know is it has somethin to do with hallways?)

4.wear my friar robes with nothing under them...wait...no i did this one... -.-

now i cant remember any of the others...but there are more...i just know it...

well tonight i went to great world and met E.lei, E.E., and Ben to watch a movie. ended up going to Timezone for a while to play games. I got nailed in air hockey by E.lei which was funny. Ben and I played that anti-terrorist gun game again and i ended up wasting my whole card...yah lol...it was fun though. then watched E.lei play DDR (dance cance revolution), she is pro at that lol...E.E. wouldnt go though :P.

when we looked at the movies...there was only one movie we could really watch. Ended up watchin garfield 2, was pretty funny lol. Then everyone went to coffee bean, lol I wasnt thirsty so i just sat and talked...lol we all talked for three hours. I didnt understand alot of the conversation considerin it was about E.lei and E.E.'s life in Shanghai...sadly i dunno much bout them. the conversation consisted of the names Frankie, Mike, and Micheal. Now I really have no clue who any of them are except Mike...and i still know next to nothin bout him :P. ended up leavin the table for a short walk, had to collect my thoughts...was startin to get depressed lol. And I won a staring match against E.lei XD

later shared a taxi with ben home, lol his house is pretty far back in the area....i could probably still walk there...ive walked furthur :P.

When the taxi was bringin me home...i decided to get out and walk the rest of the way. Ended up getting out at king alberts area, then walked. I like to think in the dark and walk. It really helps me concentrate.

Finally got home and decided not to eat dinner...didnt eat anythin all day so i guess its not exactly a healthy choice.went up to my room and started to listen to music by unwritten law and funeral for a friend and here i am now...sitting here...erm...

sorry i couldnt get the pictures to work...lol

2006-06-14T22:29:00.000-07:00

sorry if anyone read the post i made last night...was definatly confusin...is k....

i am aware of the fact that i act depressed alot...but perhaps puttin me down further isnt gonna help XD

I was talkin to Yuka bout courses and she asked "what electives are you taking next year?". Now funny enough, i thought about it...and i dont really have one!

my classes next year:

criminal forensics

zoology

chemistry

algebra II

geometry

japanese

american studies

american studies is two course technically and i have all core classes >.<

oh well, I think im here to learn, and it seems like ill be doing alot of that next year. next year isnt gonna be much fun, there is barely anyone in singapore these days. seems like everyone is gone, the softmores are pretty much still here...so is kewl. with the courses im takin, i dunno wat teachers im gonna have... my coucilor doesnt hand out schedules if you ask.

oh well gonna post again in a few days...till than adios amigo's ^^fdsdfs

a breif boring history of my year :P

2006-06-14T00:43:00.000-07:00

a whole year has passed and so much has happenned...its so hard to beleive so many people have left, and so many grudges were made. Everyone has had their fair share of love, hate, and stress this year. even though so much happenned this year, and most of it wasnt good, i would probably only change one thing about it.

the beginning of the year was ok, just getting to know our teachers, getting an idea of the course and truly enjoying our first year in highschool. everyone was havin fun jus hangin out and stuff. lol I think the second day of school i ran into someone that went up to me and said "hey ben how are you?". now this seems normal, except i don't remember ever seeing this person. I was really trying to figure out who this was till finally he said "yah this school seems nice compared to LGB." then it struck me...it was Alex!!! I felt really stupid for not remembering my friend from switzerland. but this was an example of how fast people can forget their friends, and even today ive had this happen to me. Here in singapore I usually can be seen sitting with the guys at the juice zone tables (located in front of the cafateria). back then me and my friends sat in the greek theater, an open imitation of a collesuem. sitting outdoors was really nice, especially when there was a forest right next to you. used to play soccer alot with the softmores...i really miss that. -.- im really happy is was good at the game red ass. if you lose everyone gets to penalty kick at you while u stand motionless with your back to them. lol yah memories, but yah the juice zone tables were the closest thing to the greek...and the conversation is ALMOST the same.

lol after a few weeks of school i sorta got stressed etc.... School was gettin wierd, always seemed to be trackin down my friends...didnt see them till the second or third week of school. well alot happenned between then and october, but i should start skip that for personal reasons (and no dont think odd thoughts, its not that odd). halloween, yah i havnt really ever celibrated halloween. lol well i went with adrienne and joseph after school. we hung out for a while then we left for woodlands. we went to jians house to meet her and of all times, jian was no where to be seen. jian was at louis house as it turns out and louis called an d asked "what are you guys doing!?!"...well we answered him with, aand his answer was "WHAT THE HELL"S A THREESOME!!!???!!!". lol well we went to louis, whome was lookin like a wierd british punk rocker. at louis house we got our pic taken and well life was good. -.- we tried to go trick or treating but everyone was dry of candy. we were out real late and i ended up stayin at louis house. beleive me, louis likes games alot so he had me playin burnout till one in the mornin, I was tired for some odd reason :P.

halloween was over, and the days past then went on pretty slow and sad because E.lei and E.E. had to move to shanghai... lol thats half of the morning tables members and two good friends gone right there. i still remember the post it note that said "do not disturb the pillow monster" on E.leis back. lol yah sad enough...i was cleaning out my old bedroom, and it was in one of the drawers....its in pretty good shape considering...

december...exams...E.lei and E.E.'s departure....the U.S. i will say no more than that, its a personal thing.

january my birthday, and a very tiring new year. got back in singapore on the 8th or 7th...yah i was really sad...was thinkin bout how when i go to school... E.lei and E.E. were not going to be there. got me really depressed, especially after my stay in the U.S. I remember clear well how i was acting, I was semi-suicidal and was quiet...my dad asked if i was ok, and i wanted to tell him...but i just said i was stressed and tired. grades sufferred a little from the depression, but it wasnt really that bad. valentines...i think ill regret forever...

well lol im too tired to talk bout the rest... ill edit and add more later so its kewl this isnt really a story, and its not an odyssey, its just my life. judge it how you like, i know i left things out, but thats for good reason...never speak aloud with your heart in public, because when you are done you have to remember there are two answers to every question.

wassup

2005-10-16T04:42:00.000-07:00

this will be my other blog... i dunno why but yah